The Poison List (3/1/2012)

Time to debut a new weekly feature here on Its Raining Meng… hope you enjoy it:

Future WWE Studios Projects, Using the 2011 TNA Pay-Per-View Schedule as Working Titles

by Bryan Hughes

Genesis: After four years in a coma, a dying elderly man begins speaking, telling an intricate oral history of the creation of the universe to the only nearby doctor (David Otunga), who can not tell if the story is divine intervention or all a figment of his imagination.

Against All Odds: Dealing with the strain of major budget cuts and a dwindling job market causing an exodus of families, a grizzled high school baseball coach (Jerry Lawler) gets creative in order to design the perfect team to challenge for the state championship, restore glory to past success, and bring hope to a small Oklahoma town.

Victory Road: Tempted by the grand prize of “anything he could want in the world”, troubled teen Peter Fielding (Zack Ryder) enters a contest where he must walk continuously at a rate of over 4 miles per hour, under penalty of death, with the last survivor declared the winner.  (Currently on hold due to lawsuit with Stephen King.)

Lockdown: Marisol Hernandez (Eve Torres) is a single mother and the only female prison guard in San Quentin, where she is forced to deal with the hardships of chauvinistic coworkers, threatening inmates, and the unexpected appearance of her ex-husband, who had just been sentenced to death row.

Sacrifice: Retired cop Joshua Cohen (Yoshi Tatsu) is forced out of retirement when a series of brutal, ritualistic, publicly displayed murders turn into a trail of clues leading to his family as future victims.

Slammiversary: In a zany comedy, a past-his-prime American sumo wrestler living in Japan (Brodus Clay) must balance the promise made to his wife of 20 years to renew their vows, with his desire to compete in the one tournament that’s always eluded him, which happens to be in the same city on the same night.

Destination X: After waking up from a dream so vivid it had to be real, a forensic scientist (CM Punk) descends into madness after neglecting his comfortable life to track down the exact location of the supernatural paradise he experienced in his dreams.

Hardcore Justice: Dolph Ziggler plays Anthony Flare, a former adult film star turned rogue detective who is forced to return to his former life (and former adversaries) while investigating a series of porn star murders.

No Surrender: A female cage fighter (Nikki Bella) who has been banned from every fighting organization in America, joins an illegal woman’s underground tournament, where the dishonor of tapping out is met with immediate death.

Bound for Glory: In a comedic underdog story, Mick Foley plays a lovable but eccentric landscaper who chains himself to the oldest tree in his Vermont hometown out of protest of demolition by the company that employs him.

Turning Point: After a ten-year flawless record, a high-powered financial attorney (Titus O’Neil) loses his first ever case, which sends him into a downward spiral, until he realizes the most important moments of his last career happened outside the courtroom.

Final Resolution: Given one year to live on New Year’s Eve, London power broker Max Hanwick (Randy Orton) spends his final 365 days making good on a lifetime of broken promises until only one remains unfixed: a reunion with two estranged childhood friends and one former love (Kelly Kelly) at the site of their deceased friend’s Kentucky home.

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One Response to The Poison List (3/1/2012)

  1. Harry says:

    I’m not gonna lie, I would watch most of these movies.

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